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Adams Media Corporation Gregory Bergman - WTF?: How to Survive 101 of Life's Worst F -Ing Situations Adams Media Corporation Gregory Bergman - WTF?: How to Survive 101 of Life's Worst F -Ing Situations

Adams Media Corporation Gregory Bergman - WTF?: How to Survive 101 of Life's Worst F -Ing Situations -

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Robinson Publishing Michael Powell - The Mammoth Book of Great British Humour (Mammoth Books) Robinson Publishing Michael Powell - The Mammoth Book of Great British Humour (Mammoth Books)

A doorstopper of a collection of the very best of both contemporary and classic British wit and humour. From Monty Python's 'Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more ...' to Dan Antopolski's 'Hedgehogs. Why can't they just share the hedge?'. From George Bernard Shaw to Michael McIntyre, from Eric Morecombe to Omid Djalili, and from Oscar Wilde to Jimmy Carr, a side-splitting look at Britain, the British and life in general. Including these gems from Britain's finest comedians: I was delighted to learn that my friend's schadenfreude was not as satisfying as mine. Armando Iannucci. I went on a girls' night out recently. The invitation said 'dress to kill'. I went as Rose West. Zoe Lyons For a while I was the perfect mother. Then the Pethidine wore off. Jenny Eclair. My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that. Jack Dee. Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings because it's hardly ever for them? Harry Hill. Arse-gravy of the very worst kind. Stephen Fry on The Da Vinci Code. You have to come up with this shit every year. Last week I just wrote "I still love you, see last year's card for full details." Michael McIntyre on Valentines Day. I went to the doctor and he said, 'You've got hypochondria.' I said, 'Not that as well!'Tim Vine. I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge. Spike Milligan. When someone close to you dies, move seats. Peter Kay. My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden. Eric Morecambe. My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen. Jimmy Carr. Eighty-two point six per cent of statistics are made up on the spot. Vic Reeves. A bird in the hand invariably shits on your wrist. Billy Connolly. Getting divorced isn't like a bereavement at all, because if he's died, I'd have had me mortgage paid, and I could'

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Createspace Ralph Waldo Emerson - The Conduct of Life Createspace Ralph Waldo Emerson - The Conduct of Life

The Conduct of Life is a collection of essays by Ralph Waldo Emerson published in 1860 and revised in 1876. In this volume, Emerson sets out to answer "the question of the times: " "How shall I live?" It is composed of nine essays, each preceded by a poem. These nine essays are largely based on lectures Emerson held throughout the country, including for a young, mercantile audience in the lyceums of the Midwestern boomtowns of the 1850s. The Conduct of Life has been named as both one of Emerson's best works and one of his worst. It was one of Emerson's most successful publications and has been identified as a source of influence for a number of writers, including Friedrich Nietzsche. Three years after publishing his English Traits, Boston's Ticknor & Fields announced on 27 December 1859, an "early appearance" of a new book by Emerson titled The Conduct of Life. Confirmed as "completed" on 10 November 1860, Emerson's seventh mayor work came out on 12 December of the same year-simultaneously in the US and in Great Britain (published there by Smith, Elder & Co.). It was advertized as "matured philosophy of the transatlantic sage" and sold as a collector's item "uniform in size and style with Mr. Emerson's previous works." Quickly running through several editions in the U.S. (Ticknor & Fields announced a third edition only a week later) it was soon picked up by a third publisher (Cleveland's Ingham & Bragg). In Great Britain, it was reported as "selling rapidly." Subsequently, several passages from the book appeared in popular U.S. newspapers, most of them quoting either from 'Wealth' or 'Behavior' (especially the 'Monk Basle'-passage and Emerson's treatment of the human eye). First translations of the book appeared during Emerson's lifetime in France (1864) and in Russia (1864). Still, the height of the book's international fame came around the turn of the 20th century, coinciding with a growing public interest in one of Emerson's most famous readers: Friedrich Nietzsc

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Night Shade Books Michael Aronovitz - Phantom Effect Night Shade Books Michael Aronovitz - Phantom Effect

Jonathan Martin Delaware Deseronto is a six-foot-five serial killer with a problem. He's stuck out on I-476 in a heavy November rainstorm with two flat tires and the dead bodies of a cop and a co-ed named Marissa Madison in his trunk. Desperate to get off the highway, he drives his car on its back rims towards Exit 6. The car stalls on the ramp and Deseronto uses the last of its momentum to plunge over the crest of a steep slope and crash into a length of concrete pipe below. The car comes to rest on the edge of a construction site where machines are positioned to tear down an old Motel 6. For Deseronto, the worst is yet to come. Marissa Madison had been a psychic of sorts while alive, using her ability to assist people in their personal journeys. Now, the ghost of Marissa will utilize her strange gift, trapping Deseronto in the abandoned motel, and forcing him to live the last, fatal week of her own life as a passive passenger in her body ...Soon, Deseronto will experience something truly horrific: the mind-numbing terror of being stalked by himself.

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Gildan Media Corporation Mike Michalowicz - The Pumpkin Plan: A Simple Strategy to Grow a Remarkable Business in Any Field Gildan Media Corporation Mike Michalowicz - The Pumpkin Plan: A Simple Strategy to Grow a Remarkable Business in Any Field

Each year Americans start one million new businesses, nearly 80 percent of which fail within the first five years. Under such pressure to stay alive-let alone grow-it's easy for entrepreneurs to get caught up in a never-ending cycle of "sell it-do it, sell it-do it" that leaves them exhausted, frustrated, and unable to get ahead no matter how hard they try. This is the exact situation Mike Michalowicz found himself in when he was trying to grow his first company. Although it was making steady money, there was never very much left over and he was chasing customers left and right, putting in twenty-eight-hour days, eight days a week. The punishing grind never let up. His company was alive but stunted, and he was barely breathing. That's when he discovered an unlikely source of inspiration-pumpkin farmers. After reading an article about a local farmer who had dedicated his life to growing giant pumpkins, Michalowicz realized the same process could apply to growing a business. He tested the Pumpkin Plan on his own company and transformed it into a remarkable, multimillion-dollar industry leader. First he did it for himself. Then for others. And now you. So what is the Pumpkin Plan? Plant the right seeds: Don't waste time doing a bunch of different things just to please your customers. Instead, identify the thing you do better than anyone else and focus all of your attention, money, and time on figuring out how to grow your company doing it.Weed out the losers: In a pumpkin patch small, rotten pumpkins stunt the growth of the robust, healthy ones. The same is true of customers. Figure out which customers add the most value and provide the best opportunities for sustained growth. Then ditch the worst of the worst.Nurture the winners: Once you figure out who your best customers are, blow their minds with care. Discover their unfulfilled needs, innovate to make their wishes come true, and overdeliver on every single promise. Full of stories of other successful entrepreneurs

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Bandit Publishing Jillian Dodd - Vegas Love Bandit Publishing Jillian Dodd - Vegas Love

Hollywood actress, Ashlyn Roberts, just had the worst week of her life. Her ex released a sex tape of them and just when she was convinced her current boyfriend was a keeper for standing by her side, he breaks up with her at a friend's wedding. She's planning to drown her sorrows in booze when she meets a sexy stranger as she's leaving the wedding and they end up in Vegas, married. Cash Crawford is offered a dream job working with his brother as a junior talent agent. He'll put his shiny new law degree to good use and make a bunch of money in the process. His first task is simple: Keep Ashlyn Roberts out of trouble and don't sleep with her. Which might be kind of tough, since they definitely consummated their Vegas wedding. Will this one night stand end in the quickie divorce they promised each other? Or will they realize they got lucky in love?

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Hachette Book Group Michael Connelly - Void Moon Hachette Book Group Michael Connelly - Void Moon

Cassie Black has never looked back. She walked away from her life as a criminal after one disastrous night that left the man closest to her dead and her life in a shambles. Now she's thriving at a job selling Porsches to Hollywood hotshots. Through everything, even her darkest moments, she has been able to keep going by holding on to one perfect thing, her greatest secret, dearer to her than life itself.When that secret is threatened, Cassie tosses her new life away like a bad hand of cards and goes back in a sprint to her old line of work. Her trade was robbing casino gamblers, and she was the very best. Now it's the only way she can make money fast enough to maybe make everything right. Quickly she lines up a mark, a man who has been winning steadily for a week at high-stakes baccarat. The job goes smoothly until she opens his briefcase and discovers a world of trouble she never dreamed of. Her superstitious friend who lined up the job says it's the bad-luck void moon having its malignant way. Cassie knows it's worse. She's crossed paths again with her life's nemesis, the man who destroyed everything six years before. He's Jack Karch, a private investigator by day who does bloody work for casino owners by night. Walking back into his sights is the worst thing that's ever happened to Cassie. Getting out alive will take all her skill and luck and faith in that one good thing.

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Cutting Edge Press Jonny Gibbings - Malice in Blunderland Cutting Edge Press Jonny Gibbings - Malice in Blunderland

An unnamed hero is about to experience the worst week of his life and waking up in a car park with only one shoe is just the start. By the end of the week he will have been beaten up more than once, arrested by the police several times and will have crossed the twisted leader of an Ukranian Mafia Cartel. The very, very bad sex with a nymphomaniac wheelchair-user, getting mistaken for a serial rapist and facing death - his own and someone else's - proves that his life is spiralling out of control. Not for the faint-hearted.

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Createspace Independent Publishing Platform Joe Nunn - CROUCHING In Random Places Createspace Independent Publishing Platform Joe Nunn - CROUCHING In Random Places

The truth about Bi Polar Disorder, Mania and Psychosis all wrapped up in a disturbing tale of love and obsession. Never before has there been such an enlightened insight into the machinations of a broken mind, written by a true sufferer of psychotic mood imbalances and obsessional behaviour. You will cry with laughter and sorrow and no doubt feel uncomfortable at some of the subject matter, but above all you will be rewarded with a rare insight into the life of a manic depressive and the high and lows that this entails. If you truly wish to understand depression, mania, psychosis and obsession then forget the hundreds of texts book that repeat the same old dross. This book tells you exactly as it is and you will be rewarded with not just a new and in depth understanding of mental illness but also be entertained like you will never have been before....and yes, that's me on the cover, doing what I have been doing for years...so I pass you over to Kirk, my closest confidant and alter ego... Welcome to the hilarious and sad world of Kirkland Christie; a manic depressive with an obsessional character that sees him spend his time kerb jumping, hiding in hedges, midget hunting, aggressive ham eating and of course CROUCHING; Despite all his mental shortcomings or because of them, he finds himself in a wonderful relationship with the sexy Lucy and all of a sudden his life seems to be turning around. However, things don't go to plan and soon Kirk is left facing his very worst demons... This may be the strangest love story ever; the tale revolves around Kirk's burgeoning relationship with Lucy and covers a six week period in which his life goes from manic fuelled highs to cataclysmic lows. You may find much of the content to be quite disturbing as Kirk's mind focuses on all sorts of outlandish concepts, but as a long term sufferer of Bi Polar Disorder himself, the author refuses to pull any punches when it comes to describing the affect a broken mind can have on its owner and

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Saint Martin's Griffin,U.S. Lish McBride - Hold Me Closer, Necromancer Saint Martin's Griffin,U.S. Lish McBride - Hold Me Closer, Necromancer

Paperback. Pub Date: May. 2012 Pages: 342 Publisher: Square Fish Sam leads a pretty normal LiFe He may not have the MOST my field adequately JOB in the world but he's doing all the right-until a fast food prank-ings him to the attention of Douglas. a creepy guy with an intense violent streak. Turns out Douglas is a necromancer who raises the dead for cash and sees potential in Sam. Then Sam discovers he's a necromancer too. but with strangely latent powers. And his worst nightmare wants to join forces ... or else. With only a week to figure things out. Sam needs all the help he can get. Luckily he lives in Seattle. which has nearly as many paranormal types as it does coffee places. But even with newfound friends. will Sam be able to save his skinHold Me Closer. Necromancer is a 2011 Bank Street - Best Children's Book of the Year.

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